Nik Wallenda is going to walk a tightrope across the Grand Canyon. Whoopee, I am wondering can he……..
Get into a pair of Spanx without hurting himself?
Survive a Birthday party at Chuck E Cheese’s with 20 Five year olds?
know which of his children is rolling his eyes behind his back without even turning around?
Before he heads out to work (walking a tightrope) will he make the beds, do a load of laundry, prepare for dinner, answer the phone, make and pack a lunch,swiffer the floor, do the banking and stop at the Post Office?
Has he ever worn a bathing suit in public?
Take his daughter shopping for her Prom dress?
Take his son shopping. Period?
Please everyone at the same time?
Balance a checkbook with no money?
Chase the monsters out from under the bed?
Chaperone a Field Trip for 4th graders?
I am thinking walking a tightrope over the Grand Canyon would be a picnic. (But I would never do it! I am afraid of heights!)
My head is spinning.
*Disclaimer: This has been a week-long effort of clearing my head of static.
The New Miss USA is from Glastonbury, Conn. where I was lucky enough to grow up. Which made me remember that my sisters and I use to play Miss. America all the time. If I remember correctly I was Bob Barker and Andi always won the crown. Maybe that is where my obsession with crowns started.I must have had crown envy. Anyway, I was wondering if people would rather be Miss America or Miss USA. I have always thought that Miss USA was a fake pageant and Miss America is the real deal but it does not matter to me because the only Miss I want to be is Mrs. Donny Osmond.
Thank you Debbie Gallant for making one of The Thinkers wishes come true.
SBS still feels like home. I was so happy to spend time there this weekend with forever friends. I am not sure why but I was filled with nostalgia for the people who are no longer with us. I am thinking this is because I was where I knew and loved them most. I walked into the Dance Studio and saw Jane Perkins standing in her spot by the record player. You heard me correctly, I said record player. We ate dinner in Emerson Hall (The Gym) and I saw John Beattie on stage once again directing us with love and humor. I stood outside Mr. Wray’s office and thought about all the times I walked in just to say hello. I am so grateful to have known these amazing people and miss them always. But I realize how very lucky I was to have known and loved them.
I also learned this weekend that I was the most naive Proctor ever! Sneaking out, Rabbits, TV’s and whatnot!
Physical Therapy is challenging but I love my Physical Therapists. We have the best conversations. Today’s topics were Guacamole, Walk In Closets, In Laws, Step Parents, Super Bowl Rings and the Bruins. Never a dull moment.
I love thunderstorms.
I am out of school one week from today!
Invite me. Don’t invite me. Whatever. Just stop pretending that you are the one wronged.
Is it normal for my belly to be hanging over the top of my jeans? I say we all unite and bring back the “Mom” jeans. My Gap friends will remember these as The Classic cut.
How is it that I worked in retail for 20 years, my clothes take up 30% of the space in my house and I consider shopping my life’s work and I still have nothing to wear?
I don’t have to exercise. I work up a sweat just getting into my spanx.
Today will be my last Lunch Duty of the school year. Thank you Baby Jesus. I am happy to say the oranges are cut into quarters this year so I have not been asked to peel 5,000 oranges.The added bonus is the funny faces the kids make when the shove a piece of the orange into their mouths and make a monkey face complete with noises. It makes me laugh every time they do it. My new nemesis is the Capri Sun juice pouch. I can not insert the straw without making a mess. I hate those little pouches of torture. It almost makes me miss peeling the oranges. Today is my last Lunch Duty of the school year. Thank You Baby Jesus!
I received an email from Nordstoms (The Mother Ship) today. We have a first name, lets email each other relationship. The email subject was “Sneak look at Fall”. I love Fall, it is my favorite season but COME ON!, I have not even switched my closet to summer yet! Please let me enjoy the few weeks of summer before I have to think about Fall. Why are we always rushing things…..
I want this cake. Let me rephrase that, I NEED this cake. It’s pink, it’s covered in butter-cream frosting roses and it’s cake. It is all the things that are right in my world. I hope my family is listening because I could not be any clearer or demanding. I NEED THIS CAKE!
Some mornings I wake up, make coffee, get lost reading and writing on my laptop and am almost late for work. Like TODAY!
The Noise In My Head…….. and it is singing this!
I love this song though I do not approve of the sexy girls in teeny bikinis. Mom’s in bathing suits with skirts can rock out on a boat while drinking a beer too! Just sayin’
This years Drama Club production of “Into The Woods” is over and to say I am relieved would be an understatement. Every year it is a challenge but this year brought hurdles we have never before encountered. There were many moments of “Why am I doing this” and “Never again!”. Then on performance day there was that one moment that makes you stop, hold your breath and wish it would never end. There have been many such moments that are ingrained in my heart from the past 12 years; A student that the year before had only wanted to be on the crew now singing his opening song as the lead in Peter Pan. The student that ran off stage after her curtain call and said “I want to do it again” while giving me a hug. The year that after the cast took their final bow instinctively turned to each other and became one big group hug jumping up and down while screaming with joy and then the year one boy who hated the fact that he had to dance did it for the first time and his fellow cast-mates burst into applause. I have a heart full of amazing moments but this year a moment captured will have a special place in my heart and I am sure get me through 12 more years of “Why am I doing this” and “Never again”
One very sweet girl had auditioned but told us privately that she really did not want a speaking part but wanted to be involved in the show. We made her a Stage Manager for the Cinderella cast. She took her job very seriously and kept meticulous notes. She brought ideas and suggestions to every rehearsal. One day she brought in a bag of her jewelry that she thought would be good for the evil step sisters to wear and even showed me a little drawing she had made of how she thought they should be costumed. She was so happy to be a part of the cast and she was a joy. The day of the show, after the dress rehearsal and before the evening performance, the kids were having some downtime. Lauren was trouble shooting the microphones. I was making sure the props were put back where they belonged and Lance was practicing the songs on the piano. It was a quiet moment between all the chaos. I looked out onto the stage and there she was dancing. She was all be herself, lost in the music, center stage twirling and dancing as Lance played. I stopped to watch her and she had a huge smile on her face as she kept on performing her own private dance. I tried to get a few pictures but none of them captured the moment but it really does not matter because the picture of her dancing happily on the stage is forever in my heart.
Last night when I got home after being out of the house for about 12 hours I walked into a mess. It had been a trying day so it would have been very easy to let myself get angry. I didn’t which was surprising for me, Instead I found myself grateful and the chaos even brought a smile to my face. I looked around and this is what I thought…………………
There was bread, a knife and a tomato on the counter. This meant The Thinker had eaten something. He was full and he was happy.
Princess Pissy Pant left her Straightener, or as I like to refer to it “The Reason She Lives”, on the back of the couch. This meant she was felling better and after 2 days of resting her aching back she was out and with friends.
The mail was in a pile on the table. This meant The Saint had not gone through the mail which is a good thing because he has no idea why we get mail and what I do with it. When he does try to sort it he throws away the bills and saves the stuff with pictures on it i.e. Junk Mail.
There was a new book by the coffee machine which meant The Thinker had finished another book and at some point tomorrow I am going to have to hear all about it.
The Television was on and nobody was watching it. I actually like this. I keep the TV on all the time. I like mindless noise.
Jack was sitting on The Thinker’s backpack. I have no idea why he always does this but he does.I think The Thinker purposely leaves the backpack on the table so Jack can sit on it. The Thinker loves Jack and this makes me happy.
The list, and by list I mean the millions of pieces of paper with scribbles on them, of things to do for the play were strewn all over my computer but more things were crossed off than not AND THIS MAKES ME HAPPY and very relieved.
As usual the kitchen floor was dirty but it made me think of all the people I love walking in and out of the house. I love them even if they do not how to stop for one moment and wipe their feet when there is a Monsoon outside.
When I went into the bathroom the plunger was in the sick. This actually did not make me happy but at least I was not home when it was used which means nobody asked me to fix the problem!
The account book was still on the counter from the few moments I had this morning to pay bills. I use The Thinkers toy Playschool calculator ( They spell it Playskool but that makes me crazy). He bought it with his own money when he was 3 and I use it balance the checkbook. This makes paying bills more cheerful and even makes little musical sounds when you hit the keys.
I saw the shopping bag in the corner with the shoes I just bought waiting to be put away. This makes me happy!
The junk drawer was left open (how hard is it to shut a drawer?) and when I went to close it I saw the Stacy’s chips which reminded me we had Olive Tapenade Hummus in the fridge that I am eating right now as I write this.
Some days I walk in and all I see is the mess. Occasionally I am blessed enough to walk and see all that I have to be grateful for.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning in a cold sweat filled with dread. I just laid there and tried to figure out what was wrong. I had a perfect night filled with music, food and friends before I went to bed.Everyone was home safe and sound under one roof so what could possibly be filling me with such a dreadful feeling. I started making a list in my head which most likely was not the best idea so I did what I always do when my head is full of static, I wrote it down.
Maybe I woke with a feeling of dreadful doom because………..
I have to wear a bathing suit…..in public.
I am still recovering from seeing Matt Damon in a bejeweled thong in “Behind the Candelabra”.
The Drama Club show is one week away and we are nowhere near ready.
I have to fly in 43 days.
They cancelled “Smash”.
I have to go grocery shopping at some point today and it is the first of the month.
Something is wrong with someone I care about and they are not telling me. I always go to the worse place scenerio.
It’s Jenbration and I wish I could celebrate with her,
My life is most likely more than half over,
There are evil people on the world and really is there a safe place?
I am never going to lose the baby weight.
I only have 2 more boxes of Pumpkin Spice waffles left and they will nor be available again until October.
My shampoo says rinse and repeat and I never repeat. Maybe that is why my hair looks this way?
I ordered a wrap from my favorite sandwich shop to be delivered to school during Book Fair. The delivery guy that scares me because he looks and sounds just like the bad guys in Taken and Taken 2 now knows where I live and work.
What if the Bachelor/Bachelorette never find their Soul Mates?
Did I mention the bathing suit thing?
What if Bell Bottoms make a come back? Eekk!
Will Princess Pissy Pants find a job that makes her happy and help pay for her Student loans?
Are Jakey Boom Boom and Lil Bit really having a vegan wedding cake? Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
I still do not know how to do the “Electric Slide”.
What if June 30th comes and goes and nobody remembers my Birthday!?!?
It is now Tuesday and I have the same feeling of dread. What the hell is it?????
The Noise In My Head (and it is filled with the theme from Jaws).